Understanding How Hair Plays a Vital Role in Dating

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Understanding How Hair Plays a Vital Role in Dating

Hairstyling is at its most accessible today. Everyone can be their own hairstylists, whatever skill level they may possess. No one can stop you from buying a pair of hair-cutting shears online and following a tutorial on YouTube. If you want to add some colour, drop by any local drug store and find aisles of box dyes.

In fact, hairstylists themselves promote awareness of professional hair styling knowledge. Arguably the most prominent one, BradMondo, is prolific in sharing reaction videos full of tips and comments on the science of styling.

With tools at hand, we are more hair-conscious than ever. Many of us change our hair to reflect our moods. It can affect the way we see ourselves and others. As such, it is a variable in dating and other relationships.

Here are how hair plays a role in dating, whether through our unconscious projections or deliberate styling.

Hair Change in Times of Relationship Transitions

Hair is the one thing in our appearance we can change drastically without surgery or cosmetics. Thus, doing so provides some sense of control. A quick hair change provides comfort in times of relationship troubles. This has become so common that we now have the terms “breakup hair” and “divorce hair.”

Psychologist Dr Sanam Hafeez says this is how some people mark a new beginning. She also says it’s another way people start their healing process. Changing their appearance is a manageable place to start. With something bold such as vibrant hair colour, it doesn’t have to be something for the long run. It’s a subtle announcement that the person had shifted into a mental state of self-esteem security because they took action.

Likewise, a drastic hair change is also a subtle way people can signal sexual availability. For some, putting more effort into their appearance is a sign they’re ready for someone new.

Bangs and Sex Appeal

In her social experiment, Sylvia of LuxyHair went on dating apps with two different hairstyles: one with bangs and one without. After one week of swiping, Sylvia claims she had more interaction when she used photos that show her in bangs. She says, “With the bangs, I had a lot more people liking specific photos.”

While this may only be a small-scale experiment, many people have expressed the undeniable appeal of bangs. It has a similar effect as smokey eye makeup in such a way that it draws attention to your eyes by adding shadows to surrounding areas. They add intensity to your eyes, making them seem flirty or seductive.

Of course, proper styling is a given. Your face shape dictates which fringe cut works best for you.

Bangs can also make your face look more angular, which is a characteristic of facial attractiveness. Science says this can be said for both men and women. Well-defined facial features drive male and female attraction, although the specifics may differ.

Males with sharp jawlines and long noses are generally seen as more attractive. Some examples are Ryan Gosling and Adrien Brody. With some bangs, males can create the illusion of a sharper facial frame.

For females, the heart-shaped face shapes of ReeseWitherspoonand Selena Gomez are”mathematically beautiful.”Blunt bangs can create this triangular shape by making the lower part of your face appear more protruded.

Additionally, the discovery of the golden ratio has explained how geometry and symmetry dictate our unconscious perception of facial beauty.

Beards and Sex Appeal

Beards are also a way for men to create an illusion of a sharper jawline. John Krasinski, for example, has a prominent nose which is seen as attractive for males, but he has a soft jawline that feels appropriate for his guy-next-door image during his stint in The Office. By adding a full beard, he created a more chiselled jawline, fully transforming into the action hero, Jack Ryan.

Do Female Blondes Have More Fun?

A study by the dating website AYI.com answers in the affirmative. After analyzing more than 3 million interactions among their users, they found that female blondes received 28% more matches than females of other hair colours. The leading second is brunettes, with 25% more matches. Redheads come third at 6%.

It’s quite different for male users, on the other hand. Silver-haired guys at the top with 29% more matches, while blonde men are only in fifth place.


While bald men come in third at AYI’s survey, some still believe there is a stigma against them. This created a dating phenomenon called “hatfishing,” wherein men hide their male-pattern baldness by wearing hats or hoodies. 40% of women said they would stop seeing someone if they were hatfished, but perhaps the problem lies in the deceit, not the hair loss itself.

Loving Your Own

With proper styling and maintenance, all kinds of hair textures can frame your face the way you want it to. Chop it, dye it, or add some length, as long as you make it your own. After all, confidence is attractive.

Caitlyn Knuth

This is Caitlyn Knuth from Vancouver, Canada. I am a teacher, traveler, and story writer.

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